Leprechaun 4: In Space (1996)
Trailer:
*Spoilers Throughout*
Coordinates: A group of
space marines interstellar armymen run afoul of the Leprechaun… IN SPACE. Based on true events.
Here are some of my observations as I watched the film:
- I didn’t see the first three Leprechaun movies so I’ll be completely lost. I don’t know how he ended up in space in the first place!
- You know the best thing about Leprechaun movies? They’re short.
- This space CGI looks as good Walter Koenig’s head merkin from Moontrap (coming soon!!).
- See, why the fuck is the Leprechaun on a planet with a chained up human broad? Did this happen at the end of Leprechaun 3? I am not willing to find out. [edit: so we watched the end of Leprechaun 3, and it didn’t have jumpin’ jack shit to do with this one except that the Leprechaun is in it, so I guess all of the Leprechaun sequels are completely standalone, which is not a good choice if you’re trying to build a Leprechaun cinematic universe]
- A little bit of the bubbly!
- This space cave looks like a colonoscopy. And this movie is probably going to be as enjoyable as the time I woke up in the middle of a colonoscopy. I may have mentioned that on this site once for four times in the past few years, but I know you always like hearing about it.
- That broad is a space princess who the Leprechaun is trying to seduce with gold. It’s always gold with him. That’s all these Leprechauns care about these days.
- So
space marinesinterstellar armymen go to kill the Leprechaun. It’s like Aliens with a much higher budget. - The Leprechaun uses a
lightsaberlazer sword. He’s gonna get the shit sued out of him by the inventor of lightsabers: Pierre Le’Tsabre. - So they blow up the Leprechaun, then one of the marines pisses on his corpse and the Leprechaun infects his dick. This movie could probably be classified as some kind of STD.
- So the Leprechaun is reborn from that guy’s fandangler, and then the Leprechaun roams the ship looking for the princess and causing various mischiefs. The not-space-marines hunt him down and he picks them off in really uninteresting ways. It’s really not worth expanding on or writing about.
- At least there’s some fun actors in this. Gary from Bachelor Party! Spider from Return of the Living Dead! Warwick Davis from Leprechaun 2!
- Why doesn’t the Leprechaun just go get the princess and magick his ass out of there?
- Man I feel bad for Warwick Davis. But I guess he was making a decent paycheck for minimal work. I guarantee that he spent more time in the makeup chair than in front of the camera. Which is also funny because the Leprechaun makeup looks worse and worse as the series goes on until eventually it’s just Warwick with a pale green hat on and some slightly reddish stubble.
- This is really about on the same level as The Gingerdead Man.
- The Leprechaun has been shot many times and it does nothing, but they keep trying to shoot him. Just like Dead Space (coming soon!!), but with Gary from Bachelor Party instead of Bryan Cranston.
- The Leprechaun seems to have powers similar to the djinn in Wishmaster but 1/1000th as creative.
- Oh there’s also a mad scientist who’s half computer but he’s really annoying so who cares. And the sergeant of the interstellar armymen is a cyborg and is in drag for some reason and I really don’t want to put you through all this.
- You’d think this movie would at least be fun but it’s as dull as butter knife made of actual butter.
- I’m sorry this is a minuscule review but there’s really nothing to say here. I thought this would be a fairly enjoyable watch, but I got Lepreconned.
- Leprechaun grows to giant size but it doesn’t have any affect on anything. Couldn’t he have done that with his own magic? I have no idea how his magic works. He can make things like lazer swords and dynamite appear out of thin air and bring himself back to life after he’s blown up but he can’t just like leave the ship or make more gold. What he really should use his powers for is to turn all regular Cookie Pusses into Cookie O’Pusses.
- Leprechaun is pleased that his wiener is also giant, but it’s still proportional to his body, so what’s the difference? It’s not like he can have sex with a normal-sized woman now. Or even a larger-than-average man.
- They blow Leprechaun out the airlock. How original.
- They then stop a self-destruction countdown. How original.
Scare Stars: It’s a fucking Leprechaun movie.
Gore Galaxy: There’s a bit. The Leprechaun gets blown up a couple of times, and an interstellar armyman gets melted by acid in a horrible scene in the “garbage room” of the sip. Then they didn’t have any more money for gore effects so every time the Leprechaun kills someone they show a static shot of space.
Nudity Nebula: The princess shows her royal boobs, which in the movie they say is a death sentence, but if so write my obituary!
Space Vacuum: They’re on one planet in the beginning that looks like melted plastic dogshit, then 97% of it takes place on a “spaceship” that looks like a giant warehouse, which is likely exactly what it was.
Best Transmission: “I’d give you a round of applause but I see you’ve already got the clap.”
Best Visual: The human spider monster at the end actually didn’t look like bad, which probably means they pulled an Ed Wood and stole it from another set.
Worst Visual: Sometimes it seems fairly obvious that Warwick Davis agreed to only do a weekend’s worth of shooting on this picture, hence the second antagonist human computer spider monster guy. In some scenes it’s very obvious that even though he’s supposed to be killing someone he’s not even in the same room at the same time. The most glaring example of this is when the Leprechaun is in a room with an interstellar armyman and they’re having a conversation but the Leprechaun is behind some pipes and they’re never in the same shot. Then he drops a big crate on the guy for the most boring death scene since Jenny in Forrest Gump.
Universally: If I had one wish granted to me, it would be that I picked a different movie to review. The only thing that saves this Irish disgrace from the negative is Warwick Davis, who’s always fun and seems like a nice guy and does his best with the weekend he’s given. But the whole thing is just a pot o’ shit, and what else would you even expect with Leprechaun 4: In Space? You’d hope there would at least be some fun moments but there really aren’t. Fortunately, there’s really no reason you would ever watch this unless you’re a drunken masochist from the Emerald Isle or a Leprechaun movie completionist, although those are both the same thing.
Analysis: 1 Piece of Leprechaun Gold That’s Really Just One of Those Chocolate Coins but the Chocolate Is Really Cat Poop (out of 10)
“Leprechaun cinematic universe” Oh holy shit, my dudes. That made me laugh far more than is healthy. Awesome review, as always. Fucking LOVE Schlocktoberfest, And I’m in a goddamn fight with cancer at the moment, so I need all the smiles I can fucking get and y’all are helping. Just so you know. So maybe the fuckawful movies will be a little less awful knowing you’re helping someone keep on keeping on! (Even if that person is a dorky ass, foul-mouthed fucking weirdo, hey still counts!)
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Wow, thank you so much! I’ve always said, if I can make just one person laugh… then I’ve made one person laugh. Very best of luck with your health. We’ll be here all month and maybe you’ll laugh at least one more time before we’re done!
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Pierre Le’Tsabre!!! Hahahahaha.
I’m surprised there weren’t more Irish puns in this review. No mention of Cockles and Mussels? Me thinks this review really put you in a sour mood.
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