Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 3-17-2014

Todays Headlines

 

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

RECENT OSCAR WINNER LUPITA NYONG’ROTOR IS IN DEEP DISCUSSIONS FOR A LEAD ROLE IN STAR WARS EPISODE VII PLAYING THE DAUGHTER OF LANDO AND C-3PO.

JAMES CAMERON IS GOING TO USE “DEEP” 3D FOR THE NEXT 17 AVATAR MOVIES. HOW DEEP? SO DEEP, PUT YOUR ASS TO SLEEP.

HALLE BERRY’S STORM, A CHARACTER NOBODY CARES ABOUT, WILL ONLY BRIEFLY APPEAR IN X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST. THIS MOVIE IS ABOUT AN ALTERNATE REALITY, BUT WHETHER OR NOT SHE WILL HAVE THE HORRIBLE ACCENT FROM THE FIRST FILM OR HALLE BERRY’S REGULAR SPEAKING VOICE LIKE THE OTHER FILMS REMAINS UNCLEAR.

GODZILLA TOY WITH TAIL-SWINGING ACTION!!!!! R.O.T.O.R. CANNOT WAIT TO STAB LITTERERS IN THE EYE WITH IT!

TODAY’S BIRTHDAYS: KURT RUSSELL IS STILL TRYING TO ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK AT 63!

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]
[TODAY’S TRAILER: BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA]

 

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