Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 12-30-2013

Todays Headlines

R.O.T.O.R HOPES YOU HAD A HAPPY AND HEALTHY HOLIDAY. NOW BACK TO HURTFUL AND HOMICIDAL!

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

TOM CRUISE IS OUT OF THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN BECAUSE THAT WAS NOT ENOUGH MEN FOR HIM.

ROGUE HAS BEEN CUT OUT OF X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST, POSSIBLY BECAUSE SHE IS USELESS AND NOBODY LIKES HER.

THE PUBLIC IS SCREAMING FOR ANOTHER CLASH OF THE TITANS MOVIE, BUT IT IS NOT LIKELY TO HAPPEN FOR A WHILE. AT LEAST UNTIL R.O.T.O.R.’S SCHEDULE CLEARS UP SO R.O.T.O.R. CAN PLAY TALOS, GIANT ROBOT WITH SWORD, DESTROYER OF MORTAL MEN, AND NUDE AND GREASED.

WE ARE GOING BACK TO AMITYVILLE, BECAUSE WE NEED MORE HAUNTED HOUSE MOVIES, AND THE LAST AMITYVILLE MOVIE WAS SO WELL-RECEIVED.

R.O.T.O.R. FINDS IT HARD TO BELIEVE, BUT JUSTIN BIEBER’S LATEST MOVIE DID NOT DO SO WELL. R.O.T.O.R. IS MORE OF A ONE DIRECTION ROBOT, BUT R.O.T.O.R. STILL HAS MAD RESPECT FOR ALL THE BELIEBERS OUT THERE.

 

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]
[PRESENT VIDEO OF T.H.O.M.A.S. ON CHRISTMAS MORNING]

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