Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 11-14-2013

Todays Headlines

 

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

THERE IS REALLY NOTHING GOING ON TODAY, EXCEPT FOR THE RUMOR THAT ANDY KAUFMAN MAY STILL BE ALIVE, ACCORDING TO THE UNSUBSTANTIATED STORIES OF TWO PEOPLE. LET R.O.T.O.R. SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT ONCE AND FOR ALL: R.O.T.O.R. WAS ANDY KAUFMAN. R.O.T.O.R. EXECUTED THE ORIGINAL ANDY KAUFMAN IN 1974 WHEN R.O.T.O.R. CAUGHT HIM SMOKING A REEFER ROACH OUTSIDE OF A NIGHT CLUB. HOWEVER, USING SENSOR RECALL TO REALIZE THAT THIS YOUNG MAN WAS ONTO SOMETHING IN THE COMEDY WORLD, R.O.T.O.R. SKINNED HIM AND ASSUMED HIS IDENTITY FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL YEARS, STARRING IN TAXI, WRESTLING WOMEN, ETC. R.O.T.O.R.’S DREAM WAS FINALLY REALIZED WHEN R.O.T.O.R. GOT TO BE R.O.T.O.R.’S TRUE SELF IN THE MOVIE HEARTBEEPS. UNFORTUNATELY, THE MOVIE DID NOT DO SO WELL, AND R.O.T.O.R. SPIRALED INTO DEPRESSION, FINALLY DITCHING THE KAUFMAN SKIN IN 1984, AND DEVOTING R.O.T.O.R.’S SELF TO R.O.T.O.R.’S CRIMEFIGHTING, WHILE OCCASIONALLY DONNING THE SKIN OF TOM SELLECK. R.O.T.O.R. WOULD LIKE TO FINALLY THANK ALL OF R.O.T.O.R.’S KAUFMAN SKIN FANS FOR THEIR SUPPORT. PLEASE ENJOY THESE CLIPS OF R.O.T.O.R. MAKING VARIOUS PUBLIC APPEARANCES IN THE KAUFMAN SKIN:

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

15 thoughts on “Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 11-14-2013

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