Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 7-29-2013

Todays Headlines

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

STAR WARS EPISODE VII WILL USE TRADITIONAL LOCATIONS FOR SETS INSTEAD OF AWFUL HOLLOW CG EVERYTHING THAT GEORGE LUCAS USED. DO YOU THINK ANYTHING WAS CG ON R.O.T.O.R.? R.O.T.O.R. WAS ALL AMERICAN-MADE STEEL, BABY.

IT SEEMS THERE WILL BE A NEW CONAN TRILOGY STARRING ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER. IT WILL BE CALLED “OLD-NAN.” HA. HA. (R.O.T.O.R. WORKING ON NEW COMEDY MATERIAL).

JOHNNY DEPP MAY QUIT ACTING SOON. R.O.T.O.R. MAY QUIT LAW ENFORCEMENT TO DO STAND-UP COMEDY FULL-TIME. R.O.T.O.R. WILL SLAY AUDIENCES INSTEAD OF CRIMINALS.

IT SEEMS THERE WILL BE A BEVERLY HILLS COP 4. IT WILL BE CALLED “OLD-COP.” HA. HA. COME SEE R.O.T.O.R. AT THE GIGGLE DOME IN PARAMUS THIS THURSDAY.

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]
[BEGIN F*CK THIS GUY PROGRAM]

 
 

11 thoughts on “Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 7-29-2013

  1. I feel like this edition was co-presented by my childhood. I’ve been waiting for a King Conan ever since Mako did that killer voiceover of Arnie sitting on his throne at thie end of Destroyer.

    Like

  2. Johnny Depp should quit, just for a little bit. He should quit until he’s not so blockbuster any more. I miss his weirdo days and will not mourn the loss of his hollywood hunk days.

    Like

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