Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 4-1-2014

Todays Headlines

 

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

IT TURNS OUT MGM HAS THE FILM RIGHTS TO A SINGLE SUPERMAN COMIC BOOK STORYLINE FROM 1979, SO THEY WILL BE MAKING THEIR OWN STANDALONE SUPERMAN MOVIE BASED ON THAT IN A NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN-TYPE SITUATION. ASHTON KUTCHER IS RUMORED TO BE PLAYING SUPERMAN WITH CARLOS MENCIA AS MR. MXYZPTLK AND JACK BLACK AS BAT-MITE.

STEPHEN KING HAS REVEALED THAT HE HAS NEVER BEEN HAPPY WITH THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION BECAUSE IT STRAYED TOO FAR FROM HIS NOVEL, SO HE WILL BE OVERSEEING A TV MINISERIES REMAKE STARRING JADEN SMITH AS ANDY.

SHOOTING ON STAR WARS EPISODE VII HAS BEEN DELAYED UNTIL SPRING 2017 TO GIVE CARRIE FISHER MORE TIME TO GET INTO ACTION SHAPE.

KEVIN SMITH’S CLERKS III IS MOVING ITS MAIN SET FROM A CONVENIENCE STORE TO INSIDE HIS GAPING MOUTH.

TODAY’S BIRTHDAYS: IT IS R.O.T.O.R.’S BIRTHDAY. NOBODY NOTICED…

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]
[TODAY’S TRAILER: ET-X]

PLEASE VOTE IN THE VILLAIN MADNESS TOURNAMENT OR R.O.T.O.R. WILL POLITELY REMIND YOU AGAIN VIA SOME FLOWERS WITH A NOTE ATTACHED AND THE NOTE IS MADE OF DELICIOUS CHOCOLATE.

5 thoughts on “Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 4-1-2014

  1. HAHA! That fucking Shawshank poster with Shaq, omg that is going to be my desktop wallpaper for the next while. Until something even more hilarious comes along and unseats it. But I’m guessing that’ll take a while.

    Like

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