There are countless patriotic movies to watch on Independence Day weekend to get your red, white, and blue blood pumping, but for us around these parts, Jaws will always be the ultimate 4th of July picture, and it’s been a semi-annual tradition on Hard Ticket to Home Video to honor this masterpiece, mostly because we can’t think of anything else to do. So let’s continue that proud pastime with our top 30 Jaws quotes of all time!
30. Hooper: Your turn, Quint…
29. Brody: Smile, you son of a bitch!
28. Quint: These townsfolk once told me that sex with a shark is an abomination, but I proved them wrong one Christmas Eve…
27. Hooper: I pulled a shark tooth shaped like a dick out of the wrecked hull of a boat out there!
26. Quint: Here’s to swimmin’ with bow-legged women!
25. Quint: Here’s to kissin’ the men I’ve been missin’!
24. Brody: “Slow ahead.” I can go slow ahead. Come on down here and chum some of this shit.
23. Jaws: Leave me the fuck alone, you pricks!
22. Hooper: I’m not going to waste my time arguing with a man who’s lining up to be a hot lunch.
21. Quint: Cage goes in the water, you go in the water. Shark’s in the water. Our shark.
20. Mayor Vaughn: Martin, it’s all psychological. You yell barracuda, everybody says, “Huh? What?” You yell shark, we’ve got a panic on our hands on the Fourth of July.
19. Hooper: That’s a twenty-footer. Biggest god damn sandwich I’ve ever seen. But the three of us can eat it all tonight if we set our goal and we pace ourselves.
18. Quint: Farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies. Farewell and adieu to you ladies of Spain. For we’ve received orders to cornhole Matt Hooper. And so never more shall he sit down again.
17. Brody: That’s some bad hat, Harry.
16. Quint: You know the thing about a shark, he’s got… lifeless eyes, black eyes, like Brody’s wife’s eyes.
15. Hooper: Martin… I think this chum is Quint’s friend from earlier…
14. Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, Chief. That was last week.
13. Mayor Vaughn: Love to prove that, wouldn’t ya? Get your name into the National Geographic.
12. Quint: Yeah, that’s real fine expensive gear you brought out here, Mr. Hooper. ‘Course I don’t know what that bastard shark’s gonna do with it, might eat it I suppose. Seen one eat a rockin’ chair one time.
11. Pratt: A whaaaat??
10. Quint: One time I got my scrotum caught in the reel…
9. Quint: Y’all know me. Know how I earn a livin’. Strippin’ down at The Bulgin’ Mussel.
8. Brody: Larry, the summer is over. You’re the mayor of Shark City. These people think you want the beaches open.
7. Quint: Hey, Hoop, you wanna feel somethin’ permanent? You just put your hand underneath my undies… and you just feel that little lump.
6. Mayor Vaughn: I remember when this was all farmland as far the eye could see. Old man Peabody owned all of this.
5. Hooper: I never got a chance to tell Quint I truly loved him…
4. Brody: You’re gonna need a bigger boat…
3. Mrs. Kintner: Chief Brody? … HIGH FIVE!
2. Quint: Jesus H. Christ…
1. Quint: SONUVABITCH!!