We know what you’re thinking: Why wasn’t Willie Aames in this tournament? We messed up, plain and simple. There really aren’t words to express the shame we feel, but we hope that over time, you’ll forgive us.
And now the titillating results from the Schtick Sixteen!
The Dude (68%) holed Al Czervik (32%) in one!
Ron Burgundy (68%) stole Dr. Frankenstein’s (32%) brain!
Navin R. Johnson (69%) busted Louis Tully (31%)!
Arthur Bach (52%) sold Pee Wee Herman’s (48%) bike!
Frank Drebin (61%) stole Fletch’s identity (39%)!
Booger (61%) ripped up Jeff Spicoli’s (39%) card!
Clark W. Griswold (78%) fired Bill Lumbergh (22%)!
Willy Wonka (72%) is too Fargo-ne for Marge Gunderson (28%)!
CLICK IT or TICKET!
TODAY’S MATCH-UPS
| 1. Jeff “The Dude” Lebowski (The Big Lebowski) |
2. Ron Burgundy (Anchorman) |
| Quote: “That rug really tied the room together.” | Quote: “The human torch was denied a bank loan.” |
| 4. Navin R. Johnson (The Jerk) |
2. Arthur Bach (Arthur) |
| Quote: “For one dollar I’ll guess your weight, your height, or your sex.” | Quote: “All I can tell you is, I wish I had a dime for every dime I had.” |
| 1. Frank Drebin (The Naked Gun) |
11. Booger (Revenge of the Nerds) |
| Quote: “Jane, since I’ve met you, I’ve noticed things that I never knew were there before… birds singing, dew glistening on a newly formed leaf, stoplights.” | Quote: “Hey guys… Wonder Joints.” |
| 16. Clark W. Griswold (National Lampoon’s Vacation) |
7. Willy Wonka (Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory) |
| Quote: “C’mon, Ellen. It looked real. Hell – I thought it was a real gun. Didn’t you think it was real, honey?“ | Quote: “It happens every time, they all become blueberries.” |
Hard Ticket to Home Video 
If Booger beats Frank Drebin we’re shutting down the site for good.
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If Booger beats Drebin I am reporting this site as SPAM PORN
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It is.
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Impossible!! ROTOR won’t allow us to shut down the site!!
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Hmm, that is true, he does control the mainframe. How did they do it in that awful 2001 movie?
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Pulled a few plugs.
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Wait, I got it! We’ll just blast some air horns at it!
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“Ron Burgundy (68%) stole Dr. Frankenstein’s (32%) brain!”
Bullshoot!!
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How are you going to tell your wife you lost the house?
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The Dude had better pull this one off!! I love Ron, but he can’t even touch The Dude when it comes to hilarity.
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The Dude will abide… to DEFEAT!
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C’mon Drebin!!!
“It’s the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year’s Day.”
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The two-headed menace of Burgundy and Booger must be stopped! This travesty has gone on long enough.
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