Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 3-19-2014

Todays Headlines

 

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

HERE IS SOME NEW CONCEPT ART FROM AVENGERS: AGE OF R.O.T.O.R. FEATURING IRON MAN’S HULKBUSTER ARMOR, PLUS SCARLET WITCH AND QUICKSILVER. FORTUNATELY, QUICKSILVER DOES NOT LOOK LIKE A TOTAL CHUD IN THIS MOVIE LIKE HE DOES IN THE NEW X-MEN MOVIE.

IVAN REITMAN HAS GOTTEN SPOOKED AND DROPPED OUT OF DIRECTING GHOSTBUSTERS 3, WHICH IS NOW LOOKING LIKE MORE OF A STRAIGHT REBOOT, IN WHICH THE GHOSTBUSTERS MAY BATTLE THE GHOST OF R.O.T.O.R., BUT R.O.T.O.R. REFUSES TO DIE, SO THAT IS WHY THE SCRIPT IS BEING HELD UP.

PIXAR HAS ANNOUNCED THE INCREDIBLES 2, AND EVERYONE GOT EXCITED, THEN THEY ANNOUNCED CARS 3, AND EVERYONE WENT SILENT.

SOFIA “MY DAD’S DIRECTING GENES DEFINITELY DID NOT GET PASSED DOWN” COPPOLA WILL BE DIRECTING A LIVE-ACTION THE LITTLE MERMAID, WHICH WOULD ESSENTIALLY BE A REMAKE OF SPLASH, AND THIS MOVIE PROBABLY WILL BE WORSE THAN SPLASH, TOO. NOT SPLASH ALSO, THE RARELY SEEN TV-MOVIE SEQUEL TO SPLASH. SEE BELOW.

TODAY’S BIRTHDAYS: BRUCE WILLIS REFUSES TO DIE, HARD OR OTHERWISE, AT 59!

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]
[TODAY’S VIDEO: SPLASH, TOO]

 DO NOT FORGET TO VOTE IN THE VILLAIN MADNESS TOURNAMENT OR YOU WILL BE BLOODENED. PLUS, YOU HAVE UNTIL 3 P.M. TODAY TO VOTE FOR GROUP 1. R.O.T.O.R. WILL BE MONITORING THE POLLS. WITH A FLAMETHROWER.

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