R2-D2 IS IN STAR WARS EPISODE VII. NO SHERL, SHITLOCK! R.O.T.O.R. STILL IN NEGOTIATIONS TO TAKE OVER THE ROLE OF C3PO AND MAKE HIM LESS OF A PUSSY.
WINONA RYDER IS GETTING EXCITED ABOUT BEETLEJUICE 2 BECAUSE SHE LITERALLY HAS NOTHING ELSE TO DO.
DO NOT WORRY, EVERYONE—FAST & FURIOUS 8 WILL BE COMING. R.O.T.O.R. IS INTERESTED TO SEE IF R.O.T.O.R.’S NUCLEAR BATTERY SUPPLY RUNS OUT BEFORE THIS FRANCHISE DOES.
[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION][R.O.T.O.R. RECEIVED A COMPLAINT YESTERDAY THAT THE VIDEOS R.O.T.O.R. HAS BEEN PRESENTING ARE TOO CREEPY, SO HERE IS A VIDEO ABOUT AN ADORABLE ROBOT TARANTULA THAT SHOULD PLEASE EVERYONE]
I second your irrational fear of spiders. We already have enough real ones to deal with and now there are robot spiders too??
Yesterday there was a close up picture of a spider’s face front and center on my homepage with the headline “Brown Recluse Liquifies Woman’s Ear”. Needless to say, I’ll never sleep again.
Hard Ticket to Home Video 
But what about Jar Jar Binks? Clearly he was the best character in the franchise after Darth Vader. (cough cough lulz)
LikeLike
Creepy robot girls and now SPIDERS??? FUCK THIS SHIT!!!
LikeLike
What are you more scared of: spiders or girls?
LikeLike
I second your irrational fear of spiders. We already have enough real ones to deal with and now there are robot spiders too??
Yesterday there was a close up picture of a spider’s face front and center on my homepage with the headline “Brown Recluse Liquifies Woman’s Ear”. Needless to say, I’ll never sleep again.
LikeLike
WHAT??????????????????????????????????
OMGOMGOMGOMG I would have puked!!!
And then fainted…. and shit myself.
LikeLike
My thoughts exactly! It was just THAT traumatic.
LikeLike
Sounds like you guys are stoked for Hard Ticket to Home Video’s Spider Month in January!
LikeLike
Make this happen!
LikeLike
DISGUSTING!!!!
LikeLike
“Winona Ryder is getting excited about …”
Awesome.
LikeLike
If they make an Alien Facehugger motorized toy, if buy one in a heartbeat.
LikeLike
You’d be dead in an hour.
LikeLike