Inside Out (2015)
New on home video today is Inside Out which tells the story of a young girl named Riley who eats dinner at Applebee’s that naturally results in a parasitic organism invading her body and her emotions must band together to save her life but the power of Applebee’s is too strong and the organism kills all of her emotions and takes control of her body leaving her a husk of a person completely incapable of convincingly portraying any kind of proper emotion so she runs away from home and moves to Hollywood and eventually becomes famous after changing her name to Jessica Chastain.
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She’s Funny That Way (2015)
New on home video today is She’s Funny That Way the story of a woman who is so desperate to see the lost Jerry Lewis movie The Day the Clown Cried that she kidnaps every member of Jerry’s family and tortures them slowly using the combined torture techniques of both clowns and Nazis and it’s so horrific that Jerry becomes obsessed with watching her torture his family and she’s like “Wow you really are sick” and he just laughs and she keeps torturing them because she wants to make Jerry happy and maybe get him to show her the movie and he films the whole thing despite his family’s pleas and eventually he edits the footage into a film and locks the film away in a vault because he declares that it stinks and the woman is very disappointed and begs him one last time to see The Day the Clown Cried but he says it never actually existed and it was all a big hoax to get a free dinner at Applebee’s but it wasn’t worth it and she thinks that’s funny so she laughs and laughs and she’s still laughing to this day.
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Before We Go (2015)
New on home video today is Before We Go which is the story of a couple who is out on a date at a swank French restaurant and they have a voucher that they won from a radio station contest that entitles them to an unlimited meal for two which sounds crazy but really how much can two people really eat well they really take the voucher to task as they eat the restaurant dry and every time the manager asks them if they’re finally finished they smile with food all over their disgusting faces and say “Before we go” and this goes on for days and days and after all the food is gone they start eating the tables and chairs and even the drywall and never stop saying “Before we go” and the police are powerless to stop them because the voucher is ironclad and the manager eventually commits suicide and they consume his flesh and even his bones but their hunger is still not abated and eventually one of the busboys takes a good look at their voucher and says “Hey this voucher isn’t for our restaurant it’s for Applebee’s” and the couple says “Oh… ugh… forget it.”
Hard Ticket to Home Video 
Damn, we don’t have Applebee’s in England (where I live)!
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