Christmas Evil (1980)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_uAMtjDXXhs&w=640&h=385

Starring: Brandon Maggart, Jeffrey DeMunn, Patricia Richardson

Synopsis:  A Troma-produced holiday slasher film. Sadly when you put all three of those words together (Troma, holiday, slasher) you get something worse than coal in your stocking or the most vile fruit-cake imaginable. It was a simple enough premise to exploit, Christmas and a killer Santa on the loose and it still managed to be boring as hell, insipid and nonsensical. How could you go wrong with a killer Santa Claus movie (that predates Silent Night, Deadly Night by 4 years)?!?

Well make our anti-hero, Harry, have a mental disorder that was brought upon by seeing his dad, dressed as Santa, grope his mom on Christmas Eve. How exactly would that make someone go mental? He knew it was his dad so if anything he should have a sexual anxiety. But even if Harry didn’t know it was his dad and believed Santa lusted after his mom, you would think he would have a fear or hatred of Santa and loathe Christmas? Nope. In this film, our killer wants to be Santa and loves Christmas! He has Santa Claus pajamas and his apartment is cluttered with Christmas decorations all year round. He only sings and hums Christmas tunes and he even spies on the neighborhood kids to see if they’ve been bad or good. He even has a ‘nice’ & ‘naughty’ list that he routinely updates. He even works at a toy store! And when he’s miserable there because he was recently promoted to manager from toymaker on the assembly-line. His only mental problem is his unhealthy obsession with Santa Claus and the Yuletide season.

Ho-Ho-Horny!

Don’t get me wrong, Harry’s a basket-case and if you take away the Santa Claus obsession he’d be locked away just solely on his stalking of the neighborhood children. He’s one perverted fella who even owns a van, who he paints Santa’s sleigh on both sides. He anonymously harasses the naughty kid on the block, Moss Garcia (Not making that name up) because Moss wants a yearly subscription to Penthouse magazine!

He’s not using that magazine properly.

To make a long story short, Harry takes it upon himself on Christmas Eve to don his Claus apparel and steal his company’s toys and deliver them to a mental institution for children. What an EVIL deed! His next stop is to deliver presents to his nephews. HOW HORRIBLE!! Yes, two good deeds, worthy of the Santa Claus name in a movie called Christmas Evil. Why?! If you’re going to make a Christmas/Santa Claus themed slasher flick, just go all in and have him actually hunt down people and kill them. His first murder victims in this film are random guys outside a church who taunt and mock him for being dressed as Santa. He also killed them in plain sight of about 3 dozen other parishioners so that was silly and stupid, especially when he as a van with a crudely painted sleigh on the side. But it doesn’t matter because the cops are too slow to find him anyway.

And how about Moss Garcia, the only kid he had on his naughty list; you’re probably wondering what fate, Harry Claus had in store for him? A box of dirt left on his doorstep. That’s all.

Ho-Ho-Homicidal

So he kills a few people and also does some decent deeds as well but word gets out that there’s a killer Santa Claus and a mob forms to hunt him down. Yes, a mob forms; with torches! Suddenly this turned into a Frankenstein Monster picture from Universal all of a sudden. When Harry seeks refuge in his brother’s house. His brother chokes him unconscious and puts him back in his van. When the mob finds Harry again in the van, a small chase ensues and Harry accidentally drives off a small bridge. And instead of a realistic finale wherein, Harry’s van crashes into a fiery, explosive death, it instead flies off into the air towards the moon with a few excerpts of “T’was the Night Before Christmas” is recited. Even the Grinch would hate this film.

What “Works”: I can’t give this film much praise. Although its creep factor are through the charts. Since its a cheaply made slasher flick it looks great and has a decent tone. The actor who plays Harry’s brother is played by Jeffrey DeMunn, who most you you might realize is Dale from The Walking Dead and he spends 3/4 of his screen time complaining or yelling at someone, especially his hapless kids. The other 1/4 of screen time if lusting after his wife (who should’ve been Kathleen Turner who turned down the role).

The Yule-sual Suspects!

Overall: I think Silent Night, Deadly Night took this killer Santa concept and totally ran with it to a goal. Harry only kills 4 people and three of them were random kills when they mock him for dressing up as Santa. On the other hand, he does like 4 good deeds, worthy of the Santa name, so why call this film Christmas Evil? He was evil I guess but not nearly evil enough for my tastes.

Score: 2 Subscriptions to Penthouse Magazine (out of 10)