Shakedown (1988)

Trailer:

*Spoilers Throughout*

What’s This About: An unfortunately overlooked late 80’s buddy cop/lawyer action/drama.

Here are some of my observations as I watched the film:

• After Robocop and before Roadhouse there was Shakedown.

• Opening credits that feature utter shit late 80’s rap is an auspicious omen.

• That’s what it looks like to smoke crack? It is the late 80’s after all so crack was going to show up sooner or later.

• It looks like the Clockwork Orange droogs are gonna materialize under this bridge.

• Ah ha! The crack dealer turned off the terrible rap on his boom box and hit record. I think we just got our Maltese Falcon in the form of a cassette tape.

• Jonathan Elias is credited for the music as, “Composed Arranged & Realized by.” Couldn’t he have just said conducted?
  

  
  

• I almost wish William Lustig directed this.

• Nice shot from the cops to the sirens – quite impressive actually.

• By the way, this movie will not advance any sort of love or support for NY’s finest.

• Nothing gets a Gen X’er’s heart to beat faster than a stack of classic rock cassettes and a big boom box.

• Wow, a movie could still play Purple Haze in its almost entirety back in 1988.

• OK, who’s gonna try making Peter Weller’s morning Orange Julius first? Milk, OJ, a little instant coffee, and an egg. Doesn’t sound like the worst thing ever.

• Old school Jolly Time popcorn and an Orange Julius for breakfast. It’s the
  

• This rivals Marion Cobretti’s lesson on how to eat pizza in the 80’s.
  

• Oh shit, It’s John C. McGinley as opposing counsel. I…got a bad…feeling about this one Bob.

• Of course they’re in expensive suits and eating sushi on the waterfront downtown. It’s the
  

• Dalton runs into an old flame and she’s the new assistant DA. Cue Jackson…
  

• Cops calling perps in suits “Boesky” is another 80’s reference yes, but one that makes me laugh for a reason I’ll tell ya sometime.

• Dalton’s banter with the cop killer is very Arthur Kirkland.

• I’ll try not to say Weller, Murphy, or Dr. Banzai when I mean Dalton, and I will try to do the same for Sam Elliott’s Ritchie. Not Wade, Virgil, or Gar.

• Ritchie is passed out drunk in the Lyric on 42nd street watching Glickenhaus’ “Soldier.” As if I needed another reason to love this man.

• For those who think that ushers sweeping up crack vials off the floor of a movie theater was too much – it wasn’t.

• Ritchie not only sleeps at the Lyric, he keeps his toiletries in the fuse box of the theater. Not only do I love him, I’m off to Zales.

• Ritchie pulls his gun on Dalton and Dalton throws up his hands and says, “Hey man, I’m white and can’t fight.” That line only works in 1988.
  
  

• I do have to admit that it’s a little weird to see Sam Elliott saying “Dalton” and the camera cutting to Peter Weller and not Patrick Swayze.

• “I don’t wanna fuck with anybody, I just wanna dance.” If the greatest line entry was still being used this would have been it.

• Yes ladies and germs, the graffiti in the bathroom was not art direction – it was all real. That’s what it looked like to take a piss on the Deuce. In one of the Grindhouses of course and not actually pissing on 42nd street. Shit, you’d have to be outside on the sidewalk to do that – where everyone else pissed back then.

• A lawyer and a cop in the bathroom of a rundown movie theater complaining about their women. That’s how a fucking buddy cop movie starts!

• I’m sorry to be using so many exclamation marks.

• It would have been stupid to end the former sentence with an exclamation right?

• I think maybe there are too many questions being asked.
  

• Sorry, moving on. Ritchie asks if this is a shakedown and then says he likes Dalton’s tie. That’s good writing without being cheese-dick folks.

• Jesus Krispies do I miss old movie theater concession stands. Some yearn for Greek and Roman ruins, I for neatly stacked boxes of Sno-Caps placed six boxes of Lemonheads away from the popcorn bin so that they don’t melt.

• Director James Glickenhaus completed his own trilogy with this movie. We can see the posters to his previous films in the lobby of the Lyric: The Exterminator and Soldier. Both good movies as well, and will most likely appear here on “Daze” in the future.
  

• Dalton and Ritchie are eating popcorn and hot dogs walking down 42nd street under the balconies of the Lyric, the 42nd Street Theater, and the Apollo, “Ah, but a man’s reach should exceed his grasp, Or what’s a heaven for?”

• Look it up assholes.

• Dalton even drives a car that was old for the 80’s to show how cool this 80’s movie was.

• There were at least six classic cars in this shot now that I watch it closer. I hope the Art Director went on to win something sometime.

• No one really takes the time do car-mount shots anymore. You can get so much done with a perfectly executed one.

• Cops with awful mullets and drugged-out informants in Cosby sweaters. It’s the
  

• When trying to scare said drugged-out informant, mullet cop says, “We’re gonna put you in a cell with Big Leroy. A 350 pound bull-nigger faggot.” Christ, even Warden Norton over at Shawshank didn’t bring race & sexuality into this you hockey-haired, bridge & tunnel cunt.
  

• I’ve lived in NY my entire life, I’ve never seen a parking attendant dressed like that.

• Lame-ass suburban white kids entering a secret club to watch snuff films? It’s the…never mind we get it.
  
  

• Ah, the stereotype wealthy-looking, white crack whore, begging for more drugs in a $7000 dress. If I’ve seen it once…

• Huggy Bear from Starsky & Hutch is the crime boss it has been revealed. This shouldn’t be so hard a caper to foil then.

• Aside from the Winchester brothers, no one has an armory in their car’s trunk anymore.

• This B&E (breaking and entering – lingo!) here is some Lex Luthor, A-Team, McGyver shit.

• I hope the actor playing mullet cop died alone and screaming.

• Gee, ya think he’s dirty and on the take?

• This is a beautifully fucking shot movie. Seriously.
  

• See? Dalton kept prying around the dead cop’s house to see if he’s been spending money. He sees the new Porsche and voila! Ritchie was right: look at their house.

• Huggy pays for his $1million bail in court with a briefcase full of drug money right in front of everybody.
  

• Ritchie Aprile runs the evidence room. Fuh-ged-about it.

• I love the way this bar scene is lit.

• If I could invent a film genre term for this scene it would be, “Exploitation Grind-Noir.” It definitely sounded better in my head.

• If you thought Riggs’ romantic back story from Lethal Weapon was rough, well you haven’t fucking heard Ritchie’s yet. Holy hot shit flavored Jello.

• Wow. This scene with Dalton being surrounded by cops is right out of Ms. 45.

• D.S.A.F. Did Society A Favor. The Punisher’s belief system as well.

• The New Amsterdam theater. A once live sex show-filled drug den, now home to Disney’s Aladdin. Care to guess which is worse?

• Ok, the bald black guy bouncer from before shows up at the Amsterdam Vader-choking the proprietor, then pulling out the classic two silver cables that are in the fuse box to blackout the building.

• He then puts the cables on the bed and fries Cosby sweater informant with just gloved hands. Is there supposed to be a supernatural element to him or not?

• A woman’s full bush! Nice. I almost forgot we were in the
  

• Maybe not Vader or the Terminator, but the guy has automated knives on his arms and dual pop-out Uzis on his hips. Not a Sith nor from the future, but darned prepared nonetheless.

• A truly amazing chase scene here with good old fashioned stunts: real stuntmen, real cars and real locations. Pure movies like this are a dying breed.

• Prince of Darkness had a double-bill with Witchboard at Cine 42. Oh yeah, no one gives a shit – back to the car chase.

• In perfect 80’s cop fashion, the bad guy is exploded with merely two gunshots.

• What rich white woman ever worried about missing out on an apartment listing in 1988?

• Some low budget movies do in fact give a shit. Look how perfectly dressed this court scene is.

• Good soap opera post-breakup scene here.

• Huggy’s drag race seemed obviously rigged for the whole team.

• Awww shiiit, Dalton fucked his ex, the new assistant DA. Who saw that coming.

• In any other movie Dalton would be a scumbag, but not in this one.

• An exploitation movie that also adds courtroom drama on a To Kill A Mockingbird level.

• Christ, Dalton’s fiancee is a leftover extra from the country club scene in Trading Places.
  

• Ritchie’s fishing off the Coney Island shore with the lit-up Wonder Wheel behind him. Ain’t that America? For you and me. Ain’t that America? Something to see baby, home of the free with little pink houses for you and me.
  
  

• The subway hit-man from Crocodile Dundee 2 is a hit-man in this movie as well – and tries to kill Ritchie. It ends up with them fighting on a roller coaster that Ritchie pulls the brakes out of. Which naturally sends the asshole hit-man flying off into to the cool crisp Coney Island night air.

• And, being heavier than air… (tx GC)

• Any apartment that had a view like that of Central Park in the late 80’s meant affluence if you didn’t already know.

• Another amazing shot of the city from the balcony.

• Dalton’s speech to Susan on the balcony is right up there with Rick’s “Hill of beans” speech.
  

• You know it’s a serious scene if it’s in McHale’s Steaks on 46th.

• Dalton’s fiancee is pregnant.

• Hooray.

• It’s a shame when actors lie and say that they can deliver their lines while smoking a cigar.

• A very cool night scene with Dalton Pink-Panthering into the evidence room. But when he’s caught it cuts to an exterior shot of the precinct in daylight, while it’s night inside. A perfect movie like this deserves even one flaw.

• Classic Bond villain giving away everything speech here.

• Ritchie saves Dalton from being executed, Dalton gets in a sweet car chase to get back to court, where he crashes. The judge comes out and says that she won’t accept the evidence – so Roland crawls outta the wreck, dusts himself off and gives his closing argument in court; and then wins the fucking case! Why does everyone look at me weird when I say that this is one of the greatest movies ever made?
  
  

• But we’re not finished.

• After Dalton wins his case, Ritchie is outside the court with the dead cop’s brand new Porsche 911, so they have another sick car chase going after Huggy Bear and mullet cop.

• This movie is a better love letter to NYC than anything Woody Allen ever did.

• Sam Elliott gives the escaping plane the Luke Skywalker AT-AT solution by throwing a grenade up inside the fuselage, then jumping off into the river right before the bad guys explode. This movie should be immediately placed in the Library of Congress.

• Now that is an epic fucking ending in anybody’s language.
  
  

• Wait. Nope, there’s more. We’re at Dalton’s future in-law’s mansion. Turns out the fiancée lies in front of everyone at dinner about her miscarriage. But there was no baby to begin with since she lied about being pregnant because she thought she was losing Dalton. So no harm no foul.
  

  
  

• Seems like Dalton agrees with me ‘cause he interrupts dinner and dumps the psycho bitch. Dalton fucking rules – be he Weller or Swayze.

• We then smash cut to the exact same scene of Dalton entering the precinct with the cop making the “Boesky” joke to the inmates. All righty then.
  

• The end credits are to the song, “Looking For Love” – one of the greatest AOR songs of all time. The singer sounds like John Waite turning into Patti Labelle, then back again.

• Just so happens that I might know someone who can get you a copy oddly enough:
  
  
  And the balcony is now closed…
  

Final Thoughts:  This is an exploitation film celebrating at maximum volume how exploitive it is. It’s like the Grindhouses in their death throes vomited this movie out at us and said, “Don’t forget we were here.” Some Shakespearean drama mixed with Lovecraft? Sure. It’s that level of greatness.

Score: 10 Times I Rented The Tape Before They Eventually Gave It To Me (out of 10)

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