Schlocktoberfest IV – Day 14: Child’s Play 2


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Child’s Play 2 (1990)

Trailer:

*Spoilers Throughout*

Child's Play 2-posterWhat’s It About: Not long after the events of the first film, Chucky the killer doll is rebuilt and reborn and sets out to find his previous owner, Andy Barclay, so he can transfer his soul into Andy’s body to become human again. Andy however, is wiser this time around to Chucky’s plan.

Here are some of my observations as I watched the film:

  • Why do they bother cleaning and rebuilding the burnt and destroyed Chucky doll? He was part of a very popular Good Guys line of toys and I don’t see any reason to “fix” one particular doll. 
  • Like seriously, they are spending a lot of time and money on cleaning up this Chucky doll like it was worth something. They have a factory with molds and parts right?! Are they trying to prove that this doll isn’t such a bad doll after all? My lord that’s such a dumb idea!
  • How did the company even get the doll back? Wouldn’t Chucky be part of evidence in the police department?
  • How do Chucky’s eyes electrocute someone? And if Chucky has that power why doesn’t he use that more?
  • Jenny Agutter and Gerrit Graham as a married couple. That is so weird.
  • Why does Andy have a black and white photo of him and his mom? No color?
  • A girl named Kyle?
  • I know Good Guy dolls are the hottest toys in this franchise’s universe but nearly being smashed by a Good Guys shipping truck and then having a good Guy fall on Andy in his foster home is a bit much.
  • Why does Chucky bother burying the Tommy Good Guy doll? He could’ve just threw him in the next yard.
  • How old is Kyle? Does she really need foster parents?
  • Why is Kyle being so nice to Andy since she has to highly suspect he broke the heirloom ceramic piece since it certainly wasn’t her. Now she’s grounded and can’t go on her date.
  • I’m not exactly sure why Chucky is waiting so long to do anything. I’m assuming he thinks he has to kill the foster parents and Kyle so he can take Andy’s soul. So what’s he waiting for?
  • “There. See? He’s gone.” If by gone you mean the basement then sure he’s history.
  • “I’m turning human again?!” You knew that was going to happen Chuck, that’s why you need Andy so bad for. To not turn into a human plastic doll remember?
  • Speaking of Andy, he was nearly possessed by Chucky last night and he’s not even remotely freaking out or trying to flee for his life. This kid barely survived the first film and now lost his mother because of Chucky. And now he’s simply going to school like any other day.
  • How did Andy even have time to do that color homework assignment when today is his first day?
  • What kind of insult is “Microchip?”
  • Who leaves a kid all alone locked in for detention? What an asshole teacher.
  • Why does Chucky remain an inanimate doll when other people are around like the toys in Toy Story? It’s just slowing his plan too much. He’s a homicidal maniac and running out of time so why the hiding as a doll?
  • Ya know what I would do if I was Andy? Pretend to play with Chucky while in the presence of the foster parents and make sure they saw me try to hurt Chucky like rip his arm off or throw him into a fire. Chucky would instantly come alive to defend himself thus showing he’s alive to the foster parents and proving that Andy isn’t crazy.
You touch this statue Andy and you will be smothered in honey and left outside for the fire ants.

You touch this statue Andy and you will be smothered in honey and left outside for the fire ants.

  • Gerrit Graham was what, 2 feet from the ground, hanging upside down? His fall really shouldn’t have broke his neck. Unless his neck is made of balsa wood.
  • So Andy isn’t suspected of Gerrit’s death? Even though Jenny Agutter thinks he killed him? The cops say it was an accident so why is Andy being sent back to the orphanage?
  • When Chucky buried the Tommy doll his first night there wasn’t a swing above him but that’s where Kyle found Tommy—under the swing.
  • For a good while Kyle frantically looks for a small knife in the pantry. But she could’ve easily pulled out a large cleaver from the kitchen.
  • So now that Andy is back at the orphanage, Chucky now decides to kill the foster family? He should be getting back to the orphanage to get Andy.
  • Chucky needs to perform the voodoo ritual on Andy to get out of the doll otherwise he stays in the doll for good. But when does this actually occur; how much time does he have? He spent all of the first film as Chucky and this one so isn’t that too much time as the doll? I think he should be out of time now.
  • Kyle gets pulled over by a cop and he lets her off with a warning. Chucky didn’t do squat. What was the point of that scene?
Cruisin' and playin' the radio With no particular place to go.

Cruisin’ and playin’ the radio
With no particular place to go.

  • Kyle buckles up and brakes so hard that a 7 lb plastic doll flies through the windshield. You’d have to be really stupid to believe that would happen.
  • Slowest moving fire tucks ever!
  • So I was right, Chucky was too late doing the ritual and now he’s stuck as a living doll. But when he performed the ritual, the dark storm clouds gathered around the factory like the ritual’s magic was working. Why would the clouds appear if it was too late though? What a voodoo ritual tease!
  • Why are the boxes of Good Guy Dolls arranged in a maze-like configuration? Shouldn’t they just be in rows and columns?
  • Who’s working at this factory this late at night?! Why are the machines running?!
  • Chucky, despite being in excruciating pain decides to take the time to remove the knife’s hilt and plant the knife into his missing hand. Which doesn’t make that much sense since he still has another hand to use a weapon and plunging a knife into your stump must be extremely painful.
  • Why is Chucky wasting so much time killing a factory worker when all he wants is Andy and Kyle. The factory guy was not in his way of getting Andy or Kyle. As a matter of fact, why is Chucky even attempting to kill Andy and Kyle since he doesn’t need Andy any more. He should try to flee the factory and figure out his new life now as a living doll. He’s only risking his life trying to kill Andy and Kyle.
  • I’m not exactly sure what this device does that killed Chucky. It plants arms, legs and other Good Guy body parts randomly onto a doll. What purpose does this serve?!
  • I think Chucky just got killed by getting sprayed with caramel or pudding.
  • Why is Chucky SO HARD to kill? He’s just plastic for chrissakes.

Is It Actually Scary: No more and no less than the original. Chucky does his usual schtick with the yelling, cursing and jumping to life to kill someone. 

How Much Gore: I’d have to say less than the original. He electrocutes one guy, suffocates another and the other 3-4 kills were minimally gory.

This is how I feel watching this.

This is how I feel watching this.

Best Scene: For lack of a good and memorable scene, I’d have to say the finale in the Good Guys toy factory.

Worst Scene: There’s a plethora of bad and dumb scenes in this quick cash-grab sequel. Pick one. I mean just the fact that the Good Guy company decided to rebuild the same doll again after a horrific series of murders involving the doll is absurd. There’s zero reason to rebuild a burnt and destroyed toy to make the same exact toy that is made en masse in your factory every day.

Any Nudity: I’m afraid you’ll have to see Walkabout to see any of Jenny’s a-gutters.

Overall: I don’t know why I only saw the original Child’s Play when I was younger but after seeing the next two sequels I now know I didn’t miss anything. Out of all the horror icon franchises, the Child’s Plays have to be up there with the Leprechaun’s with being so redundant, dumb and insipid. This sequel brought nothing new to the table at all. It was basically a carbon-copy of the first one but less scary, less gory and less talent involved. If you’ve never seen it, don’t worry and if you’re wondering if it held up after all this time since 1990, don’t bother either.

Child's Play 2-05

Score: 4 Arm Stump Knives (out of 10)

9 thoughts on “Schlocktoberfest IV – Day 14: Child’s Play 2

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