Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 1-22-2014

Todays Headlines

 

[BEGIN MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]

QUENTIN TARANTINO IS FULL OF HATE ABOUT THE INGRATE WHO LEAKED HATEFUL EIGHT, AND NOW THAT GREAT FILM WILL HAVE TO WAIT.

THE NEXT FANTASTIC FOUR IS CLOSE TO GETTING ITS CAST TOGETHER, WITH KATE MARA POSSIBLY PLAYING MICHAEL B. JORDON’S SISTER AND R.O.T.O.R. POSSIBLY PLAYING GALACTUS BECAUSE IT IS THE ONLY ROLE THAT BEFITS R.O.T.O.R.

EVERYONE’S FAVORITE METH BITCH MAY PLAY DRUG ADDICT EDDIE DEAN IN THE DARK TOWER MOVIES-TV-THING. THE ENDING IS GOING TO BE CHANGED TO ROLAND CLIMBING TO THE TOP OF THE DARK TOWER ONLY TO FIND R.O.T.O.R. WAITING FOR ROLAND AND THROWING ROLAND OFF THE TOP THEN HAVING A BEER.

[END MOVIE NEWS TRANSMISSION]
[DRUM UP PUBLICITY FOR HULK HOGAN ALBUM]

5 thoughts on “Today’s Headlines presented by R.O.T.O.R.! 1-22-2014

  1. “I have, Hoke Hogan, injected you with the minimum dosage of poison from the power of the Ultimate Waryaaaaah! But the antibodies of Hulkamania continue to refuse what the poison can do.” -Ultimate Warrior

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  2. Oh shit dude, I guess I better get reading those Dark Tower books. I was going to save them for last, but now that they’re making it into a thing and all, I guess I should shuffle them up the list.

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